Mr. and Mrs. xxxxxx
2 xxxxxxx Dr.
RaMS.
For the first time in my life I am going to speak to you honestly. Straightforward, just as you have all my life, not worrying about my feelings because you think I need to hear what you have to say.
All of your life you have been a spoiled-child. When you don’t get your way, you make life hell for everyone around you. You throw tantrums like a three year-old and if that doesn’t work, you start bullying people into doing what you want. I will tell you now, Just like you used to tell me when I would watch my soap-operas: Quit acting like a bitch!
Get in control of your emotions! I am not responsible for your feelings, you are! Plenty of shit hasn’t gone my way in the last 47 years, but I NEVER took it out on anyone else. I sucked that shit up and let them have their way. I made myself sick doing it too.
I’m not doing it anymore. If you can’t get control of yourself, I’m sorry. Fuck you. Your father was a drunk?
Boo-fucking-hoo! At least the motherfucker had balls enough to take off. My father was a drunk and he stuck around. He and his wife belittled me all the time. For all the years that I felt like blowing my brains out in school, I would come home and I couldn’t get any peace or support from my own parents! How do you think that makes me feel? Oh I forgot, children don’t have feelings.
What the fuck did you have children for if you weren’t going to treat them right? I’m sorry, I came along and spoiled your party. I didn’t ask to come here!
You used to have parties, and invite people into your home. These people would talk to me, and I would talk back. Then you’d get mad. Tell me to leave other people alone. Laugh at me in front of your friends and make jokes about how you brought me into this world, and you could take me out and make another just like me! Or else you’d find me later on, during the party, in my room, and whip me for talking to the people! Think about that shit!
Mrs. Frank you ain’t no angel either! You stayed with a motherfucker who was jealous of his own son! You turned your back on me so you wouldn’t have to deal with your relationship! I haven’t had a mother since I was ten years old!
Do you remember when you two sat me down, when I was about nine years-old, and asked me how I would feel if you didn’t live together anymore. I told you that I’t didn’t matter and that it was up to you. You both had the fucking nerve to get mad at me, because I didn’t give you an excuse to stay together by crying, and begging for things to work! Do you remember that shit? Probably not. ASll that shit rolls off your back, it’s in your past! I ate your shit for all of my life, and just at the age of 45 was able to start letting it out and crying and dealing with things.
Now I can’t even visit you because when I visit my father locks himself in his room, or stares off into a daydream. And my mother acts like a lunatic. Criticizing my every action. Telling me not to go out at night because the neighbors didn’t know me and might shoot! Do you think I’m a dumb motherfucker? I’m not. I know I’m not what you wanted! You have made it abundantly clear by your actions that you’d prefer to have a son like Adisa. He is a joy, and I am a duty.
I am what I am. I don’t hurt anyone. I try to make people happy with what I do. I try to make people think, through my books. I never lashed out at anyone out of emotion. Until today! This is my 47 year speech! I never could say shit because you would beat me for what I would say. My opinion never mattered. I saw how other people had relationships with their parents, and how those parents would deal with their kids. And all the time, you have this fucked-up idea that compassionate-parenting was a white thing, and that it would make a kid spoiled. Spoiled like you, Mr. Frank? You actually thought that because you didn’t break my arms, and sent me to a Lutheran-school that you weren’t abusing me? You cant compare other people’s shit with yours and feel righteous cause yours didn’t stink as much!
My life has been shitty until very recently, when I decided to let all of this go, and take care of my own well-being. I have to. I ain’t having a stroke because my parents belittle my spiritual beliefs, or my ideas, and tell me to my face that I don’t know what I’m talking about , because I don’t have a diploma from some white people that says I know something. I can tell you something and you toss it away and argue with me about it. A year later you will hear it from a pastor or somebody on the radio and think it’s the most brilliant shit you’ve ever heard! How do you think that makes me feel?
I’ve appreciated and thanked you for the financial support you’ve given me when I was destitute, but if I have to keep putting up with your emotional blackmail, you AND your wife, you can keep your money. Stick it up your ass. It ain’t worth it to me! You can pat yourself on the back for throwing money at me, or you can deal with your son like a person. Period!
I’m Done with it. If you don’t want to act like two adults, then leave me alone! Don’t talk to me any more. Don’t call me with any bullshit, or attitude or butt-hurt. Suck that shit up, just like you’ve made me do all my life! If you can’t act right, look at yourselves and realize that you are not right, that you cannot admit your own faults, then don’t talk to me anymore. Take me out of the will. Give everything to Marcellus, or Adisa. I don’t want it. BYE!
-CF
2 xxxxxxx Dr.
RaMS.
For the first time in my life I am going to speak to you honestly. Straightforward, just as you have all my life, not worrying about my feelings because you think I need to hear what you have to say.
All of your life you have been a spoiled-child. When you don’t get your way, you make life hell for everyone around you. You throw tantrums like a three year-old and if that doesn’t work, you start bullying people into doing what you want. I will tell you now, Just like you used to tell me when I would watch my soap-operas: Quit acting like a bitch!
Get in control of your emotions! I am not responsible for your feelings, you are! Plenty of shit hasn’t gone my way in the last 47 years, but I NEVER took it out on anyone else. I sucked that shit up and let them have their way. I made myself sick doing it too.
I’m not doing it anymore. If you can’t get control of yourself, I’m sorry. Fuck you. Your father was a drunk?
Boo-fucking-hoo! At least the motherfucker had balls enough to take off. My father was a drunk and he stuck around. He and his wife belittled me all the time. For all the years that I felt like blowing my brains out in school, I would come home and I couldn’t get any peace or support from my own parents! How do you think that makes me feel? Oh I forgot, children don’t have feelings.
What the fuck did you have children for if you weren’t going to treat them right? I’m sorry, I came along and spoiled your party. I didn’t ask to come here!
You used to have parties, and invite people into your home. These people would talk to me, and I would talk back. Then you’d get mad. Tell me to leave other people alone. Laugh at me in front of your friends and make jokes about how you brought me into this world, and you could take me out and make another just like me! Or else you’d find me later on, during the party, in my room, and whip me for talking to the people! Think about that shit!
Mrs. Frank you ain’t no angel either! You stayed with a motherfucker who was jealous of his own son! You turned your back on me so you wouldn’t have to deal with your relationship! I haven’t had a mother since I was ten years old!
Do you remember when you two sat me down, when I was about nine years-old, and asked me how I would feel if you didn’t live together anymore. I told you that I’t didn’t matter and that it was up to you. You both had the fucking nerve to get mad at me, because I didn’t give you an excuse to stay together by crying, and begging for things to work! Do you remember that shit? Probably not. ASll that shit rolls off your back, it’s in your past! I ate your shit for all of my life, and just at the age of 45 was able to start letting it out and crying and dealing with things.
Now I can’t even visit you because when I visit my father locks himself in his room, or stares off into a daydream. And my mother acts like a lunatic. Criticizing my every action. Telling me not to go out at night because the neighbors didn’t know me and might shoot! Do you think I’m a dumb motherfucker? I’m not. I know I’m not what you wanted! You have made it abundantly clear by your actions that you’d prefer to have a son like Adisa. He is a joy, and I am a duty.
I am what I am. I don’t hurt anyone. I try to make people happy with what I do. I try to make people think, through my books. I never lashed out at anyone out of emotion. Until today! This is my 47 year speech! I never could say shit because you would beat me for what I would say. My opinion never mattered. I saw how other people had relationships with their parents, and how those parents would deal with their kids. And all the time, you have this fucked-up idea that compassionate-parenting was a white thing, and that it would make a kid spoiled. Spoiled like you, Mr. Frank? You actually thought that because you didn’t break my arms, and sent me to a Lutheran-school that you weren’t abusing me? You cant compare other people’s shit with yours and feel righteous cause yours didn’t stink as much!
My life has been shitty until very recently, when I decided to let all of this go, and take care of my own well-being. I have to. I ain’t having a stroke because my parents belittle my spiritual beliefs, or my ideas, and tell me to my face that I don’t know what I’m talking about , because I don’t have a diploma from some white people that says I know something. I can tell you something and you toss it away and argue with me about it. A year later you will hear it from a pastor or somebody on the radio and think it’s the most brilliant shit you’ve ever heard! How do you think that makes me feel?
I’ve appreciated and thanked you for the financial support you’ve given me when I was destitute, but if I have to keep putting up with your emotional blackmail, you AND your wife, you can keep your money. Stick it up your ass. It ain’t worth it to me! You can pat yourself on the back for throwing money at me, or you can deal with your son like a person. Period!
I’m Done with it. If you don’t want to act like two adults, then leave me alone! Don’t talk to me any more. Don’t call me with any bullshit, or attitude or butt-hurt. Suck that shit up, just like you’ve made me do all my life! If you can’t act right, look at yourselves and realize that you are not right, that you cannot admit your own faults, then don’t talk to me anymore. Take me out of the will. Give everything to Marcellus, or Adisa. I don’t want it. BYE!
-CF
