To the future, and beyond!

If you had any doubt that Archie and the gang would outlive both you and your grandchildren, put those fears to rest. Archie will be with us always!

In a strange utopian future based on a suburbanite dad's view of punks as future people, Mister Weatherbee is "stayin alive", or something. Oh, it's a scavenger hunt for 20th century items. I sure hope mullets and late-80's mall-hair are on the list. That would be an easy one!

One thing is still constant though, Reggie is still a sociopath. Along with the equally killable future-Veronica they set out to make life miserable for Jughead. Luckilly they have a bulky K-tel "map" that will lead them to the items in question. Glad to see K-tel is back in business so many years from the demise of the 8-track tape. By the way, why the fuck are these two rich kids even bothering with this? Shouldn't they be out drunk-driving, or fucking in a pile of money or something? I would be!

Is it really a scavenger hunt if you have a map that tells you where everything is? Jughead looks rather dashing in his black tights and Star-Trek top, and Archie's tribute to Ace Frehley is half-assed, but interesting still. The way they are mincing along I'd think they were gay, except for Archie's brown slacks. Really Archie? Brown slacks with a blue top? It;s the year 3000 and you still dress like an asshole?

I can't even follow the story for the horrible "artwork". The last time I saw figures this stiff I was at the Mummy section of the museum.
Poor Big Ethel. Science has gone so far as to create a Six-headed Psychedelic Venus Flytrap, but it still can do nothing for her face. Perhaps dentistry was sacrificed to may way for K-tel map technology.

Our story ends with some weird furry shit going down. I can't be bothered to read it. Did you know I just sold 100 Archie Digests on eBay? I hadn't even read them.