im the one that you want! - 24 (n.atx)
Date: 2011-01-21, 5:57PM CST
im short hispanic i have a son im kinda shy at first but once i warm up to you im pretty outgoing i like to go out with friends listen to music go to the movies i just like to have a good time i have a couple of tattoos and piercings im thick and curvy in just the right places im looking for someone preferably hispanic but it doesnt matter if ur not...between 21-30.......please have a job and a car i want a man not a boy im always the one to wear the pants in a relationship and i want to be taken care of for once if u think im being picky im sorry i know what i want and i like what i like if u dont like it move on im not here to play games been there done that i want someone who will respect me a treat me the way i deserve to be treated i hate to be lied to im pretty blunt and as long as ur straight up with me im alright with it i have nothing to hide and see no reason to play games i hate to be ignored and love attention if ur interested email me and YOUR PIC GETS MINE!!!
There are several interesting things I find in this ad.
1) This person, much like most young people, obviously uses the text-message as her main form of communication. I say this for a few reasons:
a)This is an ad she is using to find a date, yet she forgets to use any punctuation. It makes me think that this would be what it's like to talk to her. Long run-on sentences without a breath in between. Me staring at her as she goes from subject to subject without pause. "Cupcakes are good my son has Polio does the toilet run like that all the time Christ died because the Jews were Jews..."
b)I thought that perhaps her shift key was broken, but at the end of her run-on missive she screams at me, "YOUR PIC GETS MINE." Which in plain English means that she looks like John Goodman in drag, but wants to date a man that looks like Ricky Martin.
c) There's no foreplay. She goes right into, "i'm short hispanic". It's like finding a page from a Burroughs novel laying on the sidewalk.
If we break this ad down line by line;
i'm the one you want! - 24= I really want to get married
(n.atx)= Not a tranny cross-dresser
im short hispanic= I need an Hispanic or two for some reason
i have a son= I grew up with abstainence-only sex education and it didn't take.
im kinda shy at first but once i warm up to you im pretty outgoing= Guys usually wind up hitting on me after the pretty girls have turned them down and the bar's about to close. After they have a one-nighter with me I won't stop calling and dropping by their apartments.
i like to go out with friends listen to music go to the movies i just like to have a good time= I really have no hobbies besides doing what a group of other people are doing first.
i have a couple of tattoos and piercings= Everyone else said it was cool, so I did it too.
im thick and curvy in just the right places= In just the right places to fill out 42 waist pants, or perhaps model Hoverounds.
im looking for someone preferably hispanic but it doesnt matter if ur not...= My parents want me to marry Mexican, but I'm desperate.
between 21-30.......= I don't know how to talk to people outside of my immediate age-group.
please have a job and a car i want a man not a boy im always the one to wear the pants in a relationship and i want to be taken care of for once if u think im being picky im sorry i know what i want and i like what i like if u dont like it move on im not here to play games been there done that i want someone who will respect me a treat me the way i deserve to be treated i hate to be lied to im pretty blunt and as long as ur straight up with me im alright with it i have nothing to hide and see no reason to play games= I have terrible taste and will date the first douchebag that comes along and hands me a smooth line.
i hate to be ignored and love attention= I am extremely needy.
if ur interested email me and YOUR PIC GETS MINE!!= As stated above.
So, a literal and honest reading of this ad would be:
I'm 24 and really want to get married. I'm not a tranny or cross-dresser.
If you happen to have extra I could use an Hispanic or two. I grew up with abstainence-only sex education and it didn't take. Guys usually wind up hitting on me after the pretty girls have turned them down and the bar's about to close. After they have a one-nighter with me I won't stop calling and dropping by their apartments. I really have no hobbies besides doing what a group of other people are doing first. For example, everyone else said it was cool to have tattoos and peircings, so I did it too. I'm fat enough to fill out 42 waist pants, or perhaps model Hoverounds. My parents want me to marry Mexican, but I'm desperate, so whatever...
I don't know how to talk to people outside of my immediate age-group, so don't be outside it. I have terrible taste and will date the first douchebag that comes along and hands me a smooth line. I am extremely needy.
I don't know how to talk to people outside of my immediate age-group, so don't be outside it. I have terrible taste and will date the first douchebag that comes along and hands me a smooth line. I am extremely needy.
If you are interested email me. Send me your picture and if it looks like Ricky Martin I'll send you a picture of my Cousin who is very pretty, but looks nothing like John Goodman in drag. If you don't look like Ricky Martin you will never hear from me.
Honesty is the best policy.
2 comments:
that's what SHE said.
Ahhh, Craigslist. The graveyard of dignity.
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